Fan Mail '99

WackyJacky polkacide@mediarare.burp Wed Dec 30 12:45:36 PST 1998

Come on in - the BEER is fine

Stony wired@whupped Tue Jan 5 17:52:23 PST 1999

Is it the New Year yet? Where's my watch?

GOD god@theHelm Thu Jan 14 08:19:08 PST 1999

Namby pamby South Park comments will be removed from this guestbook and those who write them will be smitten with pink eye an a large festering boil in their butt crack. In other words, KNOCK IT OFF BUTTHEADS!!!

Johnny Jack Burpacide@mediarare.comedy Thu Jan 14 16:07:35 PST 1999

But GOD I happen to like South Park (I even have this great new fart sound maker), I mean with the Tick gone what else is a drunk drummer supposed to watch. But I guess it would make more sense to talk $outh park here IF they put Polkacide on their sound track (HINT HINT). Yeah, time to hit some actual $outh park links and request THE WIENER DOG POLKA.

DOG dog@theBone Thu Jan 14 17:50:59 PST 1999

OK. But there's a difference between liking the show and having to wade through all the meaningless "i really like yur sho" comments. I mean, this space is about Polkacide not kennycide. Argh, just throw me a bone (or a beer) and I'll shut up...

Dan Holmes dholmes@inreach.com Fri Jan 15 23:31:48 PST 1999

I just checked out your gallery. Thank you for sharing my photo of a great band. Polkacide rules!

Mark mhudspeth@aol.com Sun Jan 17 20:56:34 PST 1999

Your show kicks ASS!!!!!!!!!

jack mhudspeth@ahole.com Thu Jan 21 08:30:25 PST 1999

Mark Mark Mark, i hope when you say our show kicks ass you mean the last polkacide show at the bottom of the hill or you've loved evey polkacide show ever or you're just playing a little joke on GOD because mark you don't want GOD to pull your little plug (if you know what i mean)...... .... ....... ......... ..................................

GOD god@theHelm Thu Jan 21 16:39:36 PST 1999

Thank you Jack. You are my right hand man.

Impor lurking@you Fri Jan 22 10:35:48 PST 1999

....and we all know what the right hand is for.

jkrfjsehrbgsjhbs kjdsjbfsjdhbg Fri Jan 22 20:09:55 PST 1999

YOU GUYS SUCK HARD

GOD god@theHelm Friday, January 22, 1999 at 21:52:45 (PST)

Thank you Impor. You shall be the backdoor man. As for jkrfksehrbgsjhbs, he shall be the protein man--and get it wherever he can.

Impo down@thecrossroads Tuesday, January 26, 1999 at 14:24:48 (PST)

"I ain' superstitious....but a flat beer crossed my trail...I ain' superstitious....but a flat beer crossed my trail...if I don' play some polka soon, my home brew surely fail....I ain' superstitious....but a flat beer crossed my trail"

Buford bwadsmith@speedeeB.com Wednesday, February 03, 1999 at 17:12:15 (PST)

I seen your music afore. When will I ever seen it agin? Dam, I like that flat beer toon Impo. You should record it. Does yuor band record? Heck, Id buy a record. You all play the damdest polka music. Ain't seen you in a long time thogh. You still as good as you used to be? --Buford

wheezie stinkylp@aol.com Wednesday, February 10, 1999 at 10:23:44 (PST)

You are hard core!!!!

keep to sounds coming.

See you at the next show.

Wheezie & Stinky.

JJACK nextshow@bottomofthehill Thursday, February 11, 1999 at 15:46:30 (PST)

Hey Wheezie, How you guys been? we'll be in your neck of the woods 4/3 or 4/4 (I think) so grab Stinky and come on down, maybe we can get Hobie and Khristine to make the trek from the Ebay. Johnny

robot clark unit robert_clark75@hotmail.com Thursday, February 11, 1999 at 17:51:38 (PST)

Where is my copy?

toad robert_clark75@usa.net Thursday, February 11, 1999 at 18:08:58 (PST)

Eddy did it! eddy did it! Careful study makes me realize that the education that was obtained was a waste of time. This is the same bullshit that was passed out to the high school students in El Paso and cause parents and educator alike to look at this and make the wrong opinion about the music as well as the real motive behind this kind of fantasy. If you read the Texas monthly you will find that the police ,educators as well as uninformed parents are having meetings in fort Worth about MARLYN MANSION and how to reconize troubled youth. This looks about like the same kind of activity but the sad fact is that won't sell unless you can become reconized by the establishment as well as the youth at large as off beat and dangerous. The logo is a good start and since i haved studied the individual in question for quite awhile i have a few suggestions. Start by playing in front of a church going crowd and pay some kids to wear t-shirt and do crime type acts while the show is in progress. Invite someone in the media to watch and write a story in the newpaper or some straight publication. Of course flyers on there cars as well a the local high schools is always an eye catching event because of the ferrets that it surely will draw. Toad!!!

toad robert_clark75@usa.net Thursday, February 11, 1999 at 18:18:35 (PST)

I just finished seeing the photo of the band and i now know that ed has misled all of the other musicans in the group. It does look like fun with beer and sausages and the german motif. But this republican has taken others down the path of merryment with another idea in mind . Goodluck Toad!

GOD god@theHelm Friday, February 12, 1999 at 09:53:02 (PST)

Toad, time to crawl back under your rock and wait for the next evolutionary shift. Now go on...SCOOT!

Justin IS A BUTTHEAD Friday, February 12, 1999 at 20:50:12 (PST)

Bye bye, Justin.

You did not heed the NO NAMBY PAMBY RULE, and are now smitten.

-- GOD

ImporHisky jumpin@shadows Saturday, February 13, 1999 at 10:59:49 (PST)

I'm not getting any of this.....is it just me, or is most of this stuff incomprehensible? You did hit a nerve when you realized the inherent contadiction and aesthetic tension of combining the Tuetonic, ie. German, Jaeger imagery with Slavic, ie. Czecho-Polish music. Good show Toad!

Bob BobZim@dylan.com Saturday, February 20, 1999 at 16:39:46 (PST)

There's nothin' happnin' here
so you can't know what it is
can you, Mr. Jones

import staring@monitor Saturday, February 20, 1999 at 18:25:21 (PST)

Leave J. X. out of this.

PolkaPolkaPolka preferredcustomer@dot.dot Thursday, February 25, 1999 at 08:06:20 (PST)

Happy belated 14th birthday Polkacide. Beer Beer Beer Beer Beer Beer Beer Beer Beer Beer Beer Beer Beer Beer, BURP.

Bob BobZim@dylan.com Monday, March 01, 1999 at 08:02:37 (PST)

Oh the times they are a changin'

jaggerededge imp@play Tuesday, March 02, 1999 at 13:46:52 (PST)

and you better keep swimmin' or you'll sink like a stone.........................

muffy slavrock@weener.com Wednesday, March 03, 1999 at 18:20:39 (PST)

HEy impy- I finally figured out where you got your name. Damn thats clever! I truly mean it. Best to all of pcide and hope that a hoppy easter jesus is coming soon unto each and every one of you. muffi

ImporHisky tugging@myforelock Friday, March 05, 1999 at 19:50:36 (PST)

Yeah, Muff, who woulda thought that there was a name for that gelatinous stuff that pickled pigs knuckles came floating in!!!

muffer mememe@meme.com Sunday, March 07, 1999 at 19:11:29 (PST)

Impor that stuff is called manteca, not hisky. Hisky is the Italian word for "Contini" and Impor the word for "Dick". Am I wrong? I thought thats what you were referring to.Muffi

Impo be@tsme Wednesday, March 10, 1999 at 15:32:33 (PST)

That's the Spanish word for it. Impor Hisky is in a southern Polish dialect. Coincidentally though, you are right on about the translation of Dick Contini. Oh well, I must get back to perfecting my pig knuckles and kim chee cassarole for the Polka Society covered dish cookoff on Saturday down at the Grange Hall! See ya there Muff!

muffii be@stmetoo Wednesday, March 10, 1999 at 19:02:49 (PST)

At least I was close! Southern Polish being my 3rd language, after all. I am invited to the dish cookoff!!?? What to wear? Ill have to whip up some of that delicious thin gruel (Neil Basa's famous recipe!) Cant wait!! Me

Curious curious@large Sunday, March 21, 1999 at 16:52:57 (PST)

Any truth to the rumor that the Polka Queen has finally been made an honest woman. My sources tell me she was spied at the Pink Flamingo Motel in Paradise, CA entering the honeymoon cottage with her two main squeezes--of course, he was carrying the accordion. --Curious

Meat Without Waste BR@WURST Tuesday, March 23, 1999 at 08:20:01 (PST)

I think it was the Sausage Queen if you know what I mean... and I know you do.

Ted Eugenis teugenis@firedrill.com Saturday, April 03, 1999 at 13:41:44 (PST)

May 1st, Portland, Oregon:
Polka Party '99, Eagles Hall SE 5oth/Hawthorne

http://firedrill.com/polka for more information

pablo anarch4891@aol.com Tuesday, April 13, 1999 at 07:08:07 (PDT)

ive never heard you but you guys kick ass

chris bitchboy punkrwker@worldnet.att.net Tuesday, April 13, 1999 at 07:10:28 (PDT)

There is something about the term hard-core polka that just makes me wanna dance! Im gonna get your cd when it comes out, cause you guys fuckin kick ass!

Dweeb dweebus@deebus.com Wednesday, April 14, 1999 at 23:15:18 (PDT)

I guess the lyric should be changed to: What is kick ass (hip)?? But I doubt if bitchboy or pablum have a clue what I'm referring to.

pablo anarch4891@aol.com Thursday, April 15, 1999 at 06:15:25 (PDT)

up dog in da frat you homies are da bomb keep it hip hop

is that better?

bitchboy punkrwker@worldnet.att.net Friday, April 16, 1999 at 12:41:25 (PDT)

kick as is really a hip statement, isn't it? I guess i shouldn't use it, for the polkacide gods said not too!! hee hee

Dweeb dweebing@you Tuesday, April 20, 1999 at 22:11:52 (PDT)

Hey Bitchboy and Pablo, say what you want and don't listen to DWEEBS! However, the thing about "you guys KICK ASS" is that it's probably been said--mmm--25 times in these fanmail clips and that's ALL that's usually said when someone says it. Like Pablo's "ive never heard you but you guys kick ass." So! What does that mean? It just blah blah, and not very clever blah blah at that. How about something like "you guys really kicked ass on Glorious the other night at the Bottom of the Hill. I'm mean it was REALLY rowdy in the Polka Pit and I bashed into this realy hot Polka babe with a large iguana tatooed on her arm... and it was good... one keg of beer for the four of us... and we bashed and we thrashed and.. I MEAN YOU GUYS REALLY KICK ASS!"

Make sense???

DJ Woijee teugenis@firedrill.com Friday, April 23, 1999 at 23:32:34 (PDT)

Polka Party, May 1st, Portland, Oregon
http://firedrill.com/polka
Eagles Hall SE 50th/Hawthorne

bitchboy punkrwker@worldnet.att.net Friday, April 30, 1999 at 05:19:10 (PDT)

Hey, you guys are from california, and im just from lonely ohio. I always liked to go to german fests and listen to polka, and now you guys went and made it cooler. So, im sorry to say that i couldn't have been in the polka pit with the good beer and all, but i haven't. Id love to, but i live 2000 miles away. but its still good, since i heard your sound files, and when your cd comes out, im gettin it!! Yee haaawwww!!! (cheap cowboy impression)

Johnny Jack underattack@home Wednesday, May 05, 1999 at 10:49:19 (PDT)

Hey bitchboy you can say whatever you like (burp) We are hoping the CD will be out in August (burp) We will be finishing the final masters (all hail Scott Strain from Noise) by next week (burp) Next up is the artwork (burp) then we can FINALLY get this puppy (Wiener dog) out (burp) If you can't get out here maybe we should go to Ohio (Cleveland BURP) Kick Ass man and always Polka 'til ya Puke (BURP) JJ

gw gw@work.now Sunday, May 23, 1999 at 08:01:38 (PDT)

This is a test Polka Pals. We've switched ISPs, which means re-configuring the CGI scripts. If you're reading this, we're back in business. Ya dadadada daaa da da...

danny dw@frontend.com Friday, May 28, 1999 at 23:44:40 (PDT)

Where is the love?
Where is the Lo-ove?
Where is the love?

Goober gordiac7@yahoo.com Thursday, June 10, 1999 at 00:07:26 (PDT)

JX where are you? It's me your old pal Goober! I wet myself when I think of you. Write me or die. Love, Goober.

T. Shane Doyle original_tin@yahoo.com Friday, June 11, 1999 at 18:31:35 (PDT)

POLKACIDE is great. When do you play outside CA? Ever come to the Boston area?

http://tatooine.fortunecity.com/gibson/201 ARK HIVE, THE

Stinky Wendtmyer Link2Allen Friday, June 25, 1999 at 22:01:31 (PDT)

Looking for Neil's e-mail address...

widow widow_brindley Saturday, July 03, 1999 at 12:43:32 (PDT)

sigh....there is a decided lack of beer and/ or polka in my life, when shall the 2 beat sound again?

Tuesday, July 06, 1999 at 08:04:52 (PDT)

HARD CORE 2/4 BABY HARD CORE 2/4

SCG700 SCG700@aol.com Tuesday, July 13, 1999 at 18:26:25 (PDT)

Hey we really would like some...all info that you would be able to muster up on the history of beignets or fried fritters. we really like 'em and we would like any cooking tips you might be able to give us. We like the polka, but we want to eat the beignets.

Fried Sushi beerbatter@heybatter Friday, July 16, 1999 at 10:30:01 (PDT)

Beignets are just fried doughnut balls with powdered sugar - thats it just a plain old doughnut. For a real treat take the center from Wonder Bread, wad it into a ball, fry it, pour ketchup on it and eat it.

Stupid pilsbury032@hotmail.com Wednesday, July 21, 1999 at 13:17:51 (PDT)

hi,....im a dork,...

CD UPDATE polkacide@mediarare.com Tuesday, August 10, 1999 at 08:05:40 (PDT)

Finally the music is mastered (Thanks Scott), the artwork is on film (Thanks Kris, Thanks RAF), the deal has been done (Thanks Gary X). Polkacide's new CD - HARDCORE 2/4 will be on Dog Patch Records and should be released between mid-September and early October, in time for your own Oktoberfest (OK TO BEER Fest). Check back here or at Dog Patch's web site (www.dog-patch.com) for more details. POLKA POLKA POLKA BEER BEER BEER.

Maegan polkaqueen_y2k@yahoo.com Thursday, August 19, 1999 at 18:56:22 (PDT)

Finally! a band I can relate to! I am glad to see Polka still kicks ass! -The PolkaQueen

lizzy girl2k@prodigy.net Friday, August 20, 1999 at 17:21:33 (PDT)

good to hear from a lady, a real polka queen. polkacide rocks but looks like the fans are mostly inebriated frat boys. not NECESSARILY pejorative guys, but say it ain't so!

ripley ripley@believeitornot Tuesday, August 24, 1999 at 20:53:44 (PDT)

Not true, Lizzy. I've bashed with many a polka slut in the pit, and believe me they could kick the alligator off the frat boys polo shirts.

muffi just Friday, August 27, 1999 at 11:28:43 (PDT)

Hi Impy and Polka pals. so sad that burning man had been the Polkacide and Stubble funfest and now seems like fratboy Porkys II. But memories of fiends and furies are still among us and dwell in the deserts and haunted polka halls across the country. There is no flat beer in heaven. Just quietly saying you guys are the best. Muffi

Steve oktoberain@rocketmail.com Saturday, August 28, 1999 at 13:41:26 (PDT)

Oh man!!this too cool!!I had a roommate in the mid 80's that got me into Polkacide,and I loved it!I never could find a copy of the LP though,and then one day on a fluke,I went into a record store 7 boom there it was!!Now,on a rather bleak hope,i look on a search engine, and find out you have a website too??!Zounds!!

Charlie cbgb@hooked.net Thursday, September 02, 1999 at 09:51:40 (PDT)

I just saw you in Cotati. Was a great show! First time I saw youse at the Polka Wars at Club Lingerie in LA in like 86 or 87. Been to the Bottom of the hill a couple of New Years Eve's. I finally got a tee-shirt after all these years and the bumper sticker's goin on my Pinto as soon as I wash it.

Lot's of Polka love to all my Polka brothers and sisters. CB

POLKACIDE UPDATE Tuesday, September 14, 1999 at 10:29:12 (PDT)

Polkacide will be opening for Brave Combo at the Great American Music Hall - Tues. 9/21 Come on out and POLKA POLKA POLKA POLKA POLKA.

gw gw@work.not Friday, October 22, 1999 at 20:46:07 (PDT)

Zzyzyg Rd. | Zzyzgy Rd. | Zzyzyx | Zz... | St. | Ln. ............ what the !#&@! was it?

Polka-ed in L.V.

G.B. is A gooooood PLACE for beer! Just ask NB!

Com'mon PolkaFannies make yur own toots.

BERNT KING berntk@hot.net Saturday, October 23, 1999 at 13:13:39 (PDT)

saw yall at Burning man 96. was and am a great fan.keep polkaing.

bunboy @worldstallest Tuesday, October 26, 1999 at 07:01:54 (PDT)

Is it true that the new CD is out? where can I get my grubby little hands on it?

bubb bubb_only@halloween.com Wednesday, October 27, 1999 at 20:36:44 (PDT)

The new Polkacide CD will be available at the CD release party at The Bottom of the Hill in San Francisco on Halloween. If you can't be there--too bad for you Polka Pal--you can e-mail the band at polkacide@mediarare.com for CD info.

The new CD will be available on the web site soon.

Hardcore 2/4!

dweeb dweebs@home.now Saturday, November 20, 1999 at 15:32:01 (PST)

Hey, cool re-design and your own domain name. You guys win the lotto? Glorious!

impor beerontap@thebar Monday, November 22, 1999 at 11:43:42 (PST)

Hey! The new web page is great! The only problem is that I think you should have more stories about the guitar player. Besides being the cutest member of Polkacide I hear he is a humanitarian, a philanthropist and a member in good standing in the B.P.O.E. He has the perfect touch on those chop chords on the two!! Aside from this minor oversight everything looks great!! PS. Whatever happened to our pal Muffy? Carried off by gypsies?

PolkaMomma @home Monday, November 22, 1999 at 18:52:36 (PST)

Hi ya'll. Haven't checked in lately but looks like it has all become like the last tune at a p-cide show...drunken, irreverant and a whole lotta fun. Polka Queen has done a wonderful job...when are you guys going to truly appreciate her?...now, let's all get behind this 12/30 gig...what else do ya have to do for the next 1,000 years?

muffi mcnuto@yahoo.com Wednesday, December 08, 1999 at 15:28:59 (PST)

hi ma havent seen you guys forever Do I still get to be a polka pal? me and stinky have made it through to the pals stage and he is ok so dont kick me out of the polka pit, k? muff

muffi mcnuto@yahoo.com Wednesday, December 08, 1999 at 15:35:39 (PST)

hi impy i didnt get to be a gypsy but I am a new member of the next heavens gate, leaving on starship pussy at 11:59 on Dec 30. I need some converts to get me into the upper level of blixx 987* heaven so will you guys wear your nike nikes and castrate yourself at that show at the bottom of the hill? I promise you will get to ride on a comet and be made handmaiden to Jesus and God and the virgin Mary. ok? luv muff

warren g. harding III wgh3@.com Thursday, December 16, 1999 at 15:21:39 (PST)

dear phil, thanks again for the renderings. ...I forget what price we had agreed on, but $100 doesn't seem out of line. ...give my regards to melinda. --warren

gw gw@home.now Thursday, December 16, 1999 at 17:33:14 (PST)

I just love the randomness of some people's descent into acute apoplexia.

jjack 2-4@youknow Friday, December 24, 1999 at 09:47:22 (PST)

Actually new years is 109 days away - April 11th 2000 - Opening day @ 1 Willie Mays plaza HOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO

Santa sclaus@northpole.org Saturday, December 25, 1999 at 19:08:23 (PST)

Ho ho ho. Merry Christmas! We could sure use some Polka up at the North Pole. Not much going on there most of the year. Damn cold, in fact. Hell, why should I beat around the bush? Why don't you all grab your instruments (and a few Polka sluts--wink wink) and come on up for a good time. Hell let's party! I'm done for the year. Woo hoo! I mean ho ho ho, Merry Christmas.

Bubb bubb@large Saturday, January 01, 2000 at 11:31:21 (PST)

All I want to know is--who stole the GLITCH?

Happy New Millenium!!!

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